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Melissa Smith

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How Scripture Frees You From Worldly Advice

How Scripture Frees You From Worldly Advice
I have a confession...

I used to google everything

Marriage issues? Parenting decisions? Spiritual doubts? I’d type it all in and read a dozen articles—none of which ever fully settled my heart. 

Why? Because worldly advice, even if it sounds good, will never satisfy a soul that was made to be led by God.

The Bible is full of wisdom for every area of life—yes, even the messy parts. 

The hard conversations. The frustrating toddler years. The lonely seasons in marriage. 

And yet so many Christian women are still leaning on influencers and life coaches instead of the Holy Spirit. 

Why do you think that is? I have a theory...based solely on my own experience.

I think it's because simply googling and having someone give you a pat answer is SO MUCH EASIER (and requires less brain power) than studying God's Word and using wisdom and discernment. 

Buuuuut here's the thing: we were not meant to outsource our spiritual guidance.

When I started replacing worldly advice with God’s Word, things changed. 

I wasn’t as reactive anymore. I stopped needing everyone else’s approval (former people-pleasers, unite!). I stopped chasing results and started seeking righteousness. 

God’s way is slower, quieter, and sometimes (okay most of the time) harder—but it’s always better.

Next time you’re tempted to scroll for advice, pause and open your Bible. 

Ask: What does God say about this? What principle can I find in Scripture? And then—this part’s important—do what it says

There are many situations in life that aren't specified in the Bible (e.g. "What if my teenager asks to be called by a different pronoun?" or "What should I do if my husband is verbally, spiritually, or physically abusive?"). That's when it's important to be familiar enough with Scripture that you can discern what God's heart would be on a particular topic - and you can point to biblical passages that explain your stance. 

NOTE: seeking wise biblical counsel in difficult situations IS OKAY (Proverbs 11:14 tells us there is safety in an abundance of counselors; Proverbs 15:22 says with many advisors plans succeed). I'm not saying you should never seek counsel. 

What I AM saying is that you should have a way to "test the spirits" and evaluate that the counsel you're receiving actually is biblical and not just take their word for it because they're "Christian".

The way you do this is by studying and knowing Scripture.

Wisdom isn’t just hearing God’s Word; it’s living it.

So sweet friend, stop settling for shallow or "feel-good" answers. You don’t need another expert opinion

You need the mind of Christ. And that comes ONLY from His Word (1 Cor. 2:16). That’s where your true freedom is found.

Tell me in the comments: when is a time when you discarded worldly advice in favor of what you knew was biblical instead?

How To Free Yourself From False Teaching

How To Free Yourself From False Teaching
I have a confession...

I am very, very easily influenced. 

For many years, I used to take someone’s word for it when it came to Scripture. If it was in a bestselling book, a Christian podcast, or spoken from a pulpit, I assumed it had to be true. 

But eventually, I started hearing things that didn’t sit right. 

Promises that sounded too good. 

“Truths” that contradicted each other. 

I realized I needed to know the Bible for myself.

Sweet friend, we live in a time where false teaching is everywhere—and it doesn’t always sound false. It’s often mixed with just enough truth to make it seem right. 

Remember how Satan first deceived Eve? In Genesis 3:1, he asked her, "Did God really say you must not eat of any tree in the garden?" 

Notice, Satan didn't just flat out lie; he used what was partially true to create confusion in Eve. She responded in the next few verses saying that God also told them not to touch the tree of life - which He hadn't.

Let's keep in mind at this point that God's instructions were given directly to Adam, before Eve was created - so she is hearing them second-hand from him.

My point is two-fold: 

First, we need to be reading the Bible for ourselves. If Eve had heard firsthand from God what His instructions were, she would have been better able to recognize Satan's deception tactics. 

Which leads me to my second point: we must be on guard against anything that seems Christian, or simply sounds biblical, and diligently study Scripture for truth before making a decision or standing firm on a topic.

God doesn’t want us to be led by clever words or viral reels. He wants us rooted in His Word, unshaken and discerning. 

Bible literacy—the ability to study, interpret, and apply Scripture—is our guardrail against deception.

As wives and moms, we are often the spiritual thermostat of the home. If we’re filling ourselves with half-truths, shallow interpretations, or worldly wisdom dressed up as “Christian,” we can throw our whole family off course. 

But when we know Scripture deeply, we are able to recognize what isn’t of God. We can teach our kids truth. We can lovingly challenge our husbands in grace. We can stand firm when culture shifts.

If you don’t know where to start, try reading one book of the Bible slowly and deeply. Check out this link for a graphic that breaks down exactly how long it takes the average person to read each book of the Bible. According to that article, "Did you know that many of those books can be read in less than an hour? 40 out of the 66 books (61% of the books) can each be read in less than an hour? In fact, some of the books will take the average reader 2 minutes to read."

And yet we often claim we don't have time to read the Bible. 

Use the SOAP or Verse Mapping method to help you engage. Check out the free Bible Study Toolkit to learn more about those and other ways to help you engage with and intentionally study God's Word.

Get a good study Bible. I highly recommend the MacArthur Study Bible (ESV)

Follow along with a solid Bible teacher, but always go back to the text. If you need a list of recommended teachers, this list by Michelle Lesley is a great place to start.

Finally, ask God to sharpen your discernment. James 1:5 tells us that if we lack wisdom, we should ask God, because He gives generously and without reproach. That means we can ask again, and again, and again, and God will never fault us for not having enough wisdom and needing to ask for more. He will patiently supply the wisdom we need, when we need it...when we ask.

Sweet friend, there is so much freedom in not being easily swayed anymore. Are you ready to have that freedom? Let's dig into the Word together! Share with me what you're most interested in learning about from Scripture!

How Studying the Bible Breaks Chains In Your Marriage

How Studying the Bible Breaks Chains In Your Marriage
Considering I talk a LOT about marriage and being a godly wife, I need to make a confession:

There was a season where I believed he was the problem. If only my husband were more "this" or did "that" less… then I could be the wife I wanted to be. 

But the real turning point came when I stopped focusing on changing him and started studying God’s Word to change me.

(If I'm being really honest, this is still something I struggle with, and I need to remind myself that my goal of studying is so that I can learn and obey better, not to have ammunition against my husband or anyone else.)

The Bible is not a marriage advice book—it’s a heart transformation book. 

When I got serious about studying it, making it my goal to learn more about God, what He desires for us and from us (especially with my marriage in mind), He started breaking chains I didn’t even know were there. 

Chains of selfishness, bitterness, control. 

Chains of unrealistic expectations and silent scorekeeping

As I read Scripture, I realized that submission isn’t about being weak—it's about trusting God’s order. 

Respect isn’t optional—it is my act of worship.

Sweet friend, if you’re in a tough season with your husband, I want to challenge you to go to Scripture first, not social media or even your closest girlfriend. 

Ask God to show you what it means to be a helper, not a fixer. 

Study the examples of women in the Bible—some got it right, some didn’t, but all of it points us back to Christ. 

(Check out my dear friend Tania's deep study on this called The Helper - it's wonderful!)

One practical thing that may help you is keeping a marriage study journal. 

As you read and study your Bible, ask God, “What do I need to do differently as a wife based on this?” Consider the applications you should make in your marriage, then journal what you're committed to doing and the passage you studied that brought it to light.

God’s Word will do the heavy lifting. You just have to keep showing up with a heart seeking truth and willing to change.

What the Bible *Really Says* About Freedom in Christ

What the Bible *Really Says* About Freedom in Christ
When I first heard the phrase “freedom in Christ,” I honestly thought it meant I didn’t have to follow a bunch of rules anymore. 

I thought freedom meant no guilt, no standards, and no pressure. 

But the more I studied Scripture for myself, the more I realized that freedom in Christ isn’t about doing what I want—it’s about finally being free to do what He created me to do.

As a wife and mom, that truth hit me hard - it still hits me hard when I really meditate on it. 

I used to feel chained to expectations—mine, my husband’s, my kids’, the world’s. 

I tried to be the perfect wife, the fun mom, the Pinterest-worthy homemaker. I was exhausted and still falling short. 

But John 8:32 says, 
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” 
Once I started getting in the Word daily, not just reading devotionals or settling for a verse-of-the-day, but really studying the Bible, I realized I had misunderstood freedom.

Freedom in Christ doesn’t mean I’m free from responsibility—it means I’m free within my calling. 

I'm free from sin; I can't use the excuse that "I can't help myself" when I'm tempted to disobey, or to avoid an act of obedience.

1 Corinthians 10:13 reminds us, 
"God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability"
I'm free from the "need" to please others, to be "just as good" at everything, and mostly importantly, I'm free from the need to control everything (the peace that comes when you recognize you're free from control because God Himself is in control...whew. THAT is peace beyond all comprehension!).

God’s Word gives me the boundaries I need to thrive in marriage, motherhood, and womanhood. 

Scripture instructs me how to love my husband selflessly, how to train up my children, and how to fight the pull of sin - without trying to do it all in my own strength. 

That’s real freedom.

If you’re feeling trapped—by shame, expectations, resentment, the tendency to control, or any other sin—I want to encourage you to open your Bible today. 

Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal truth and freedom through it. 

Pick a passage (maybe start in Romans 6!) and ask: 
  • What does this tell me about who Christ is?
  • What does this tell me about what He desires from or for me? 
  • What lie have I been believing that this verse frees me from?
Truth is the key, friend. You don’t have to stay in bondage one more day, but you DO have to take responsibility for seeking that truth out in Scripture for yourself.

How to Apply What You Study (So It Actually Changes You)

How to Apply What You Study (So It Actually Changes You)
We've been talking all month about different Bible study tools, how to study, how to make it less overwhelming and more "do-able". 

But simply studying isn't enough. If we want to be transformed by Scripture, we need to apply what we learn. 

That being said, let’s end this month by talking about the “so what” of Bible study—application.

You can read Scripture all day long, use every method under the sun, and fill notebooks with notes—but if you don’t apply what you study, it’s like looking in a mirror and forgetting what you saw (James 1:22-25).

As wives and moms, this matters so much. God didn’t give us His Word just for head knowledge—He gave it to us so we could live it out in our marriage, in how we talk to our kids, in how we serve and speak and forgive.

Here are three simple ways to apply Scripture every week:

Pick One Small Step:

After studying, ask: “Based on this passage, what one thing can I change today?” 

Whether it’s holding your tongue in an argument or getting up five minutes earlier to pray, small obedience matters.

Write it in your notes, and think about what exactly you need to hold yourself accountable to the Lord for obeying. That was a tip I was given by one of my BibleArc coaches, and I thought it was super helpful.

Speak it Out Loud:

Tell your husband or a friend what you learned. Sharing helps you remember, and it invites accountability.

This also works when you post about it on social media. Tell the world what you've learned, and maybe you'll teach someone else, too!

Write a Sticky Note Reminder:

Seriously. I’ve had verses stuck to my bathroom mirror, laundry room wall, and even the dash of my car. 

You could also use Canva to make a new phone wallpaper or lock screen with your verse!

The goal is to keep the truth in front of your face so it sinks into your heart.

Remember, if you need a little help, check out the FREE Bible Study Toolkit I created to help guide you.


Don’t just study to say you did—study to become more like Christ. 

Study to be the wife your husband needs, the mom your kids admire and called blessed, and the woman God created you to be.

You’ve got this, friend. And I’m right here with you.

 
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This is my story!

 
As a Christian, it can be embarrassing to admit I've been married three times. 

As a woman who feels called to teach about marriage and submission, it can be almost unthinkable that God would put this on my heart after two failed marriages.

But God often uses the broken to accomplish His purposes - and He does not clothe us in shame, but in righteousness.

I have lived the life of the controlling wife. I have lived the life of the controlled wife

Neither brings the blessings God has for marriage.

Through my mistakes and failures, I've learned what submission is, and what it is not.

I am learning and growing every day in my role as a biblically submissive wife, a bonus mom, and a homemaker who cares for her home and family in joyful wellness!

Join me on my journey as I share some of my lessons, tips, and ideas to equip you to live in joyful submission and wellness!

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