"At least you're not a hot mess - you’ve got your crap together. "
I heard this yesterday.
I want you to know - I don’t.
Some days sure… and boy do I feel so good at the end of those days! It’s like WOAH! I’m a good mom! I got all the things done AND I worked out!
But you guys… what it comes down to is - PERSPECTIVE.
Right now I just walked out to go get a snack for the kids and saw this:
Toys on the floor
Homeschool stuff everywhere
Cucumber peelings and apple core pieces still on the cutting board
Bowls of fruit all over the counter
And yesterday's big dishes that still need to be washed
Oh, and hey, I have laundry in the washer and dryer AND I didn't shower again today!
There are days I see this and lose my mind.
Then there are days where it’s no big deal because I know we will take care of it later.
Now am I emotionally together - this takes A LOT of hard work. I am a big rollercoaster of emotions. Like many people, I put off things that may stress or freak me out. I scroll social media or watch Netflix too much when I have the I don’t wannas. But on the day to day - I try really hard to focus on the blessings. My current task at hand is to speak these blessings out loud. If I don’t focus on being grateful for all the things the Lord has given me I fall into those blahs. If I feed my loneliness, I just end up more lonely. If I fuel the negative things that come to mind - I fall down like everyone else - AND this happens OFTEN!
Do I have it together spiritually? I know a lot of people who look at me and feel that I am so grounded in my faith. I know how I feel on the days that I doubt or that I want to give up. Again, it comes down to perspective. I dig into God’s word, like really dig a couple of times a week and read devotions or just read the word pretty much daily. To some - this is having it together. To me, it’s trying.
How about with Fitness? These days - I walk. I monitor my steps on a fitness tracker because that is ALL I can handle on a regular basis! I want to do more and some days I do actually accomplish that. BUT, I am not in a season of taking the time to be in the gym or up super early to work in a killer workout.
You see - as a mother who wears many hats, I have to decide what will be on the list and what will not. You are the only one that can decide how much can be on your list friend. You are the only one that can decide what makes you feel like a hot mess. But I want you to all know - we all feel like a hot mess - maybe not every single day.
Now… this is what I want to remind you. It’s ok. Because although we can’t make everything work perfecting each day - God isn’t asking you to be perfect. He is asking you to be willing to do what He sets in front of you to the best you can. Love those kids, care for your home, run that business, take care of your body. You may not be qualified - BUT HE IS! He will carry you through this season of feeling like you just don’t have it all together.
Now go make this roller:
You’ve Got This Mama!
10 drops Valor
10 drops Frankincense
10 drops Joy
10 drops Peace & Calming
Fill the rest of the way with your favorite carrier and apply morning, noon & night.
I am sitting here trying to determine if I have even made any progress in my life when it comes to releasing perfection and embracing the Lord’s grace. This is the struggle of perfectionism. We look at ourselves and sometimes just can’t see where we are succeeding. Our expectations are so high we never ever meet them, and so in our minds, we are not doing well. Even though that is not the truth.
Today I made a new friend through a group I am in on Facebook. It was totally a God thing and we ended up talking on the phone for a good hour. In our conversation, I was reminded that Satan will use our need for perfection to keep us from seeing, doing, going… You see wherever we allow him to sneak in, he will use it.
In what ways are you being held back because of your fear of things being not quite right yet?
In what ways are you not seeing what you are doing well?
My challenge to you - turn that around! Seek the truth.
When I can’t see what’s good or things feel mundane - I slow… I stop, or I feel discouraged because there’s no momentum or fire.
I tend to look at my behavior and look at what was wrong with it vs what was good.
So instead, I no longer allow the bad mom days to destroy me and snowball into another bad mom day.
I am learning to DO even if it’s not quite right yet.
I am learning to look at how I handle things and tell myself what was good about it. I also look at the things I didn't like and look at how I can do better instead of beat myself up.
This doesn’t mean I lower my standards to grow and become more like Christ. It does mean that I choose to be still with Christ while I work through the junk.