Updates from Verna Smoker

Hormones!  What is your first thought when you think of hormones? Moody? 

The term ‘hormonal’ has become synonymous with ‘moody,’" Hormones do affect our mood, but they do much more in the body.

PMS, depression, cravings, bloating, weight gain, irritability, all has to do with hormonal balance. We as women deal with some of these or maybe all of these. I remember having periods so painful as a teenager that I would be literally rolling around on the floor with so much cramping and pain. If only I had known about this little bottle back then!. "Progessence Plus".

Progessence Plus ™  What is it you ask?  Well, It may or many not change your world but for many women it has. 

Progessence Plus ™ is an oil blend from Young Living, made with Balsam copaiba resin, Sacred Frankincense oil, Cedarwood oil, Caprylic/capric triglyceride, Tocopherol, Bergamot peel oil (Furocoumarin-free), Peppermint leaf oil, USP-grade progesterone (from wild yam extract), and Clove bud oil. I know, all sounds so scientific. But keep reading.

Progessence Plus is specifically designed for women and is 100% plant based. It promotes feelings of relaxation, harmony and balance. I really enjoy the scent and I feel like I’m putting on perfume when I apply it. It’s delicate and florally. It’s also wonderful for moisturizing your skin.

Progessence Plus supports a healthy female endocrine system. It promotes healthy emotions and eases some of the discomforts associated with the natural aging process. It supports women’s overall well being and vitality. This little bottle most likely will become your best friend if you give it a chance.

I personally use this serum each evening and another time during the day. I find it helps my moods and make me a bit nicer if you know what I mean. Many women who suffer from all the things that go with your monthly cycle find this bottle to be a game changer and do not want to be with out.   

So don’t just take my word for it instead see what Dr Purser says about it. He was part of the team along with Gary Young helping to create this amazing bottle of Liquid Gold just for us women. The link below will give you more insight and clarity in what Progessence Plus could do for you.

progessence-plus-serum-dr-dan-purser-faq.pdf

and they stick with us far beyond the time of their telling.

It was my first day of school as a 5 year old and I was … over the moon excited!  As I sat on the window ledge intently watching my mom sew what I thought was the most beautiful dress ever … fit for a princess, I was giddy with excitement just thinking what my first day would be like.

I walked into school that crisp fall day feeling like a beautiful princess. Little did I know that at the tender age of 5 … another class mates words would change the course of my life. I would believe a LIE that was spoken to me in just a matter of seconds … for many years to come.

I believed this LIE all the way into my adult life. A few simple words is all it took. “You Look Like A Little Amish Girl” he said .... with a snarled look on his face. The teasing continued. I later picked myself up from under the Merry Go Round after being pushed off, trying to hide my dusty tear stained face and brushing the dust off of my newly sewn dress that my Mama made for me. My heart was crushed! I no longer felt like a beautiful princess. I felt different, I felt ugly. Who would want to play with me now?

Perhaps negative words were spoken over you by a parent, teacher or even other playmates growing up. Depending on how deep the wound, those memories and negative words can dictate the course of our life if we let it.

Just like when my 8th grade teacher told my Mom that I would “never amount to anything”… was a huge wound in my tender heart. My Mom was wise enough not to tell me what she said until many years later but yet, somehow I new it, I felt it. It lowered my self esteem, my self worth and I didn't feel good about myself.

Even more powerful than words of others are the words we speak against ourselves if we choose to believe the lies spoken over us. I’m not good enough, I’m never going to amount to anything, no one likes me. These are self-defeating words that kill the power and potential in our life. 

Patterns of negative thinking and feeling bad about ourselves can be difficult to break. These unpleasant feelings become routine. Studies have shown that a negative attitude has a dramatic effect on all areas of our lives and are destructive to our health. If we allow negative thoughts about ourselves  multiply or left untreated, it can lead to depression, stress, fear, unworthiness, shame and even affect our relationships. 

Because I grew up not liking myself, I was extremely shy, insecure and an introvert as a child. When I got married I felt like I was not Good Enough. Why would my husband want me? In fact our early stages of marriage I would ask him, why do you love me ... why did you marry ME? His Calm and honest answer was alway, I love you because you’re you. I married you because I love you.

I simply had to learn to love myself. I still struggle at times with my ‘inner critic’ and I mentally beat  myself up for not being good enough at times. But I’m more aware and conscious of it now and instead of dwelling on my weaknesses and flaws I dwell on the postive things about me and the thing I have accomplished.

I'm all about relationships and what makes people tick where as at one time I would shy away from people and not let them see the real me. I’m much more transparent and vaulnerable with myself instead of pretending I am someone that I’m not. These days you get the true me and that my friend... is freedom!

At some point along the way I got a fire inside of me and I set out to prove that those negative words really WERE lies and I was going to prove them wrong! And I did!

With the help positive people in my life, professional counselors, and realizing Who I Am In Christ, I can say…. I let go of that lie that was formed in my 5 year old brain. Because you see, it really was not who I was.

In doing so it changed the course of my life into a more positive way of thinking. I've become more confident and secure and I actually like who I am. It's the way God intended me to be and... feel about myself. 

So tell me, are you beliveing a lie that was spoken to you? I want to hear your story. Everyone has a story to tell, and ... telling your story could be the beginning of setting you free as well. Telling your story is where the freedom begins.

Do you have a toxic person in your life?

Draining and difficult people can be a real challenge and can feel hopeless at times. You may have a toxic friend and not even realize it.

Maybe it's a family member or a friend or even a coworker at your work place. Do you dread going to work each day because of it? Do you feel trapped in a toxic environment?

What are the signs of a toxic person?

• They try to manipulate and control you.
• They are needy and make strong demands on your attention.
• They are extremely critical of themselves and other people.
• They are unwilling to seek help or try to change.
• They are extremely disrespectful and always seem to get their way.  
•  They are jealous, critical and judgmental
• They create chaos
• Point fingers
• Avoid taking blame

Jealous people are incredibly toxic because they have so much self-hate that they can’t be happy for anyone around them. And typically, their jealousy comes out as judgment, criticism, or gossip. According to them, everyone else is wrong, just not cool, or lacking in some way. If someone starts to gossip jealously about other people, watch out, this might be a toxic person and you never know what they say about you behind your back. 

Toxic people will find a way to create drama and manipulate and sow seeds of instability to make themselves look better. They will make you feel like it's always you that did something wrong and  always accusing. They are usually unhappy with their appearance or, their life and are picking on you to validate their own negative feelings about themselves.

Realize Their Behavior Comes From Their Own Issues

Instead of assuming that the way a toxic person treats you is unique just to you, realize they will treat everyone the same way. It’s them, not you. 

If you know someone who is dictating the emotional atmosphere you are in, they are toxic. If you are suffering because of their attitude, then ask yourself, “Do I need this person in my life"?

When you delete toxic people from your environment it becomes a lot easier to breathe. If the circumstances warrant it, leave these people behind and move on when you must.  Seriously, be strong and know when enough is enough!  Letting go of toxic people doesn’t mean you hate them, or that you wish them harm; it simply means you care about your own well-being.

Limit the Time That You Spend with Toxic Individuals

 If the toxic person is a close relative or friend, you may find it easier to spend less time with them. After all, if you only see a toxic individual once in a blue moon, their hurtful behavior or words will have far less impact on your life, then if you were to spend time with them every week.

Be firm

Toxic people want their own way at any cost. So you’ll need to stand your ground when dealing with them. If you’re not giving them what they want, they’ll try all kinds of ways and manipulating tactics to make you feel like it's your fault. So be prepared and be firm.

Set Boundaries 

Boundaries are important but they will resist them. They often take advantage of people with poorly defined boundaries and low self-assertiveness. They have a tendency to want to control others as well as situations. But ... you can set limits on the things you can control. Don’t invest too much time or effort with them. Keep interactions brief and the topics light. They will be listening for anything you say that they can twist and turn around to make themselves look better. Be firm but be kind and always say nice things about someone else to be a positive influence around them. 

Here are some steps to help you maintain better boundaries:

• Avoid getting swept up in the emotional turmoil of toxic people.
• Pay attention to what you feel and need.
• Give yourself permission to be firm.
• Do not feel guilty for having to establish a firm boundary. 
• Taking care of yourself is also important. 
• Do not neglecting yourself in favor of others. 
• Learn that saying no doesn't make you a bad person.

Know when it’s time to cut ties with toxic people. Being around people that continually bring negativity into your life is not healthy for your well being and your own sanity!

Instead, spend time with people who encourage you, do activities that energize you and push you toward success. 

At the end of the day, you may need to end your relationship with the person if it's toxic. Cutting people out of your life can be a painful exercise, but in the case of toxic people, short-term pain can be healthier than long-term pain. Keeping toxic people in your life can mess with your self-esteem, your emotional balance, and your other relationships. It may be time to plan your exit.

Work with a therapist

If you have to stay involved with the person, consider getting help from a mental health professional. Therapists are trained to help people work through difficult situations like these and can offer compassionate, judgment-free support that fits your circumstances.

 Spend time with people who encourage you, do activities that energize you and push you toward success. 

Toxicity is contagious but ... positivity is also contagious. Stay productive. Don’t focus on problems, but on solutions. Successful people rise above negative energy.hey will not let toxic people bring them down. They will not give into their toxicity.

Control your emotions. Don’t let other people change the way you feel. Although it may be difficult, sometimes, the best way to deal with a toxic person is by cutting ties with them.

By removing toxic people and behavior from your life, it will be easier for you to focus on your own wants and desires, your own dreams and become a winner and an influencer.

Surround yourself with good intelligent, kind-hearted, positive, loving people.

People who build you up and have your best interest.

People who have vision and who are thinkers and people who see greatness in you. People that make you laugh and feel happy and nourish your soul.

People who will not suck the energy out of you or make you feel drained after having spent time with them. Your life is too important for anything less.

If you like this blog and want to talk more about it, I'd be happy to chat. 

Remember, you are your own best investment. Invest in yourself and your lifestyle. Quality of life is a key component in finding joy and maintaining self-confidence.” ~Akiroq Brost

Stress and burn-out happens to everyone in each facet of life. How does that happen? I use to think it was selfish to prioritize my needs over the needs of others so therefore I would often sacrifice my own well-being to take care of others. Chances are … I was doing more harm then good. Not only to myself but to the ones I loved the most. 

But… I am learning to say No. That is not always easy for me. Women and Mom’s in general are known to put others first and saying no is not always easy but ... it is necessary! It’s necessary in order not to have a complete burnout or .... a melt down which can often lead to a state of depression.

I’m learning what self care means and the importance of it. It’s important to find out what makes us happy. Self care is an individual thing for each of us. It’s really ok to do things that make us happy. Make yourself a priority. Sometimes we forget to ask ourselves the most obvious questions, like “Am I tired?”, “Do I need to take a nap”,  “Am I happy”?  I need to constantly tell myself … its ok to take a nap. It’s ok if I haven’t been productive today. Can you relate?

In the busyness of life we often forget our passion. We forget what makes us smile. Making time for US is ok and... really really important.

When's the last time you did something for you? When’s the last time you had an uncontrollable belly laugh with a friend? When is the last time you had “Me time” or when you just did what you wanted to do? Maybe Nothing.

 If we want to keep our sanity, sometimes we have to learn how to slow down and really enjoy life. We have to savor those fleeting moments. We really do need to just stop and smell the roses. When was the last time you did something just for you?

My line of work require me to be at my computer for hours at a time but ... when I need to clear my head ... I head for the creek. It's my happy place. It's where I intentionally breath in fresh air. 

I put my phone away and it's then ... that I'm more keenly aware of the birds chirping their beautiful melodies. Listening to the sound of water where my grandkids built dams and ... simply just enjoying the sounds of nature is very therapeutic. Being Still! Being present. This is self care. 

How often are we truly present in our lives? It's hard, Isn't it? We have so many things to do, places to be and people to see.

We all know that we should slow down and enjoy life more. We may try for a little while, but then we’re off to the races again, filling our lives with more busyness and distractions. 

By slowing down, we can feel the emotions we are experiencing and we can describe them. We have more clarity, We make better decisions and we are happier and healthier.

 When’s the last time you stopped to enjoy the moment?

               Doing something you are passionate about can be self care…

My passion is creating beauty out of junk. Finding an old dilapidated piece of furniture that had seen it’s best day …and only to be found on a heap of trashmakes my heart race.

For many years I owned and managed “The Cottonwood House” A shop where the old and new met. Vintage decor, beautiful painted furniture, accessories, and unique finds filled the old barn.

 I spent countless hours with a paint brush in hand and hand painted hundreds of pieces of furniture. Turning trash into beauty. To me it was hours of therapeutic therapy where my creative juices flowed freely. Even though it was physical and hard work, it was my ‘Happy Place’ and to me it was self care.

Coffee Shops are my jam! 

Meeting with a friend over a good cup of coffee and great conversation is often just what the Dr. ordered and it's great emotional therapy. I need to be intentional and put it on my calendar, other wise it's just not going to happen. 

• A hot drink relaxes the muscles, while caffeine makes the mind more receptive, communicative, and open to positive emotions.
• As you share your first laugh with your friend, the endorphins do the rest of the work: you start feeling better and your problems suddenly seem more relative.

                                       Another Passion of mine is Decorating and Decor…

Your home should reflect your personality and be decorated in a way that it can actually be lived in and not look like a magazine or be ... “off limits.” 

Fresh flowers provide a natural aesthetic beauty that soothes and is known to lower levels of stress and anxiety. Going to my gardens and finding wild ferns in the woods is a form of therapy and self care for me.The aroma of flowers fills the air and adds beauty to our home. 

I often rearrange my furniture because it allows me to be creative and it has a way of lifting my mood. 

It’s inportant to make my home a place of peace and calm. I usually have my diffuser with essential oils running pretty much 24/7.

                                     Gardening ... Mowing the lawn.

Yes, believe it or not I find mowing the yard or weed eating is very therapeutic for me. 

There are few natural joys in life like inhaling the scent of freshly cut grass.

 It's true, Australian researchers have discovered that when grass is cut, it releases chemicals that make people feel happy and relaxed. And how about this, it can help prevent the mental decline of old age.

Keeping our vegetable garden free of weeds has become a new, fun and relaxing therapeutic therapy for me.

 I know... really? 

Did you know digging, gardening and yard work is not only great physical exercise but simulates our brains and releases happy hormones. It helps to release levels of serotonin and dopamine, both hormones associated with happy feelings and our levels of cortisol decrease which reduces our stress. For me it's another form of self care.

Do you love candles?

     I did too but ... not anymore!

I never allow artificial air fresheners or candles in my home. First of all, most candle makers use paraffin, a petroleum by-product that is chemically bleached and hardened. 

Burning paraffin pollutes your air. Second, these candles are typically synthetically scented. These synthetic perfumes are not well-regulated so you have no way of knowing what substances are released into your home.

 Did you know perfumes and fragrances can contain any one of 3,000 or more ingredients? Many are toxic, unregulated, synthetic and may contain lead. Anything you breathe in ... eventually ends up in your bloodstream. Many of our everyday products  contain chemicals called phthalates which have been linked to reproductive problems.

True fact, Women use ... on the average 300 toxic products daily and 82 toxic products before breakfast! Shampoo and hair products, makeup and skin care, deodorants and toothpaste just to name a few. And then we wonder why our hormones are all bent out of shape! 

Click HERE to see how these products can be an endocrine disrupter.

he federal government does not eaning product 

 to disclose their ingredients to the public. Often, you literally can’t know what’s in the bottle. ingredients to the public. Often, you literally can’t know what’s in the bottle.

Let's just name a few…

A common name brand All Purpose Spray with bleach warns us to “avoid prolonged or repeated skin contact and prolonged breathing of vapors. But yet this product is designed to be used in areas that often have poor ventilation. Who wants to bring out a gas mask and industrial-strength rubber gloves every time you wipe down your sink and bathroom counters?

Another one is Comet. It has been used in millions of homes for many decades, yet it gives off chlorine fumes for up to 2 weeks after use. It can cause coughing or irritation of the nose and throat and contact with skin can cause superficial temporary irritation in individuals with lung issues.

What about toilet bowl cleaner? The label says to immediately flush with plenty of water for at least 15 - 20 minutes and if accidentally ingested, call poison control. With kids in the house you would want to have this product behind lock and key at all times and ... get this, if this product is mixed with any other cleaning product by accident, hazardous gasses may be released. Imagine that! The bottom line is … we’ve been told the only way to clean a toilet bowl is to work with a poisonous substance that gives off toxic fumes. I don't think so!

Click HERE  for more surprising facts. HERE is why you do not want these products in your home.

I ditched and switched 6 years ago…. I took several laundry baskets and went through my entire house and got rid of tons of toxic products that we used every day. And yes… I even got rid of all my candles and plugins. Imagine that! 

But now I love that my home always smells amazing and peaceful.

So ... what did I change?  How did I ditch and switch? I researched for a clean, toxic free product and I discovered Young Living. I started switching out my toxic products for Thieves products and ...  they soon became a total life style for our family. They're chemical free, steam distilled or cold pressed from pure plants and there are a million uses for them from ... meditation, cleaning supplies, personal care products like shampoo, toothpaste, make up, skin care products and even deodorant. I diffuse essential oils and ... that replace the candles I thought I couldn't live with out.

 A nice surprise ... Young living has oil-infused nutritional supplements too!  

Time To Make A Change ...

Ready to ditch toxic chemicals to the curb? I encourage you to check out the information from

the CDC HERE and see what is really in your products. It might surprise you as it did me.

Can you imagine your home smelling fabulous after using only one Cleaner [Thieves House Hold Cleaner} to clean virtually your entire home? Yes, one! Its a place to start to rid your home of dangerous toxins and it's natural and safe for your whole family. It's really easy to make the switch and so worth it!

Click HERE here to see how I made the change. It was a total game changer for our home.