Life doesn’t work like a puzzle — and thank goodness, because I’d still be trying to force the pieces to fit. In this post, I reflect on control, faith, falling short, and the small grounding practices that help me come back to myself when life feels overwhelming.
Thanksgiving is a funny mix of gratitude, joy, and mild emotional whiplash. If you’re bracing yourself for family drama, overstimulation, or the annual “Is dinner ready yet?” comments, this week’s post is for you. Let’s talk real-life emotional wellness — the kind that helps you stay centered when the holiday chaos shows up.
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Ever feel like you're drowning in your own life? Like you're juggling so many things—work, family, laundry, texts, dinner, expectations—and somehow you didn’t even make the list? The pressure is constant. The noise is loud. And slowing down feels impossible.
You tell yourself you’ll rest later. You’ll breathe later. You’ll take care of yourself… later. But “later” never comes.
The truth is, you’re not just busy. You’re burning out.
And I know, because I’ve been there too.
We’re so good at showing up for everyone else that we forget how to show up for ourselves. Self-care becomes an afterthought, something “extra,” something you wish you had time for.
But what if it wasn’t extra?
What if it was essential?
Let’s be real—when life gets busy, self-care is usually the first thing we ditch. Even though we know how much better we feel when we take care of ourselves, it still ends up on the back burner. And I’m not just pointing fingers here. I’m totally guilty of this too.
When Life Feels Like Too Much
You wake up already behind. The notifications are pinging before your feet even hit the floor. The to-do list is a mile long, and it keeps growing. The emails are piling up, someone at work needs a response now, and your family’s asking, “What’s for dinner?”—and it’s not even 10 a.m. There’s laundry to fold, bills to pay, texts to return, and maybe—just maybe—you’ll get a second to breathe between one obligation and the next. Sound familiar? When everything and everyone is demanding something from you, the last thing on your mind is slowing down for self-care. It doesn’t even feel like an option. You’re just trying to make it through the day without losing it.
You wake up already behind. The notifications are pinging before your feet even hit the floor. The to-do list is a mile long, and it keeps growing. The emails are piling up, someone at work needs a response now, and your family’s asking, “What’s for dinner?”—and it’s not even 10 a.m. There’s laundry to fold, bills to pay, texts to return, and maybe—just maybe—you’ll get a second to breathe between one obligation and the next. Sound familiar? When everything and everyone is demanding something from you, the last thing on your mind is slowing down for self-care. It doesn’t even feel like an option. You’re just trying to make it through the day without losing it.
But here’s the thing…
We Know Better. But Doing Better? That Takes Intention.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the hustle of getting things done, showing up for everyone else, and checking all the boxes. And before we know it, we’re running on fumes—exhausted, snappy, disconnected, and wondering why everything feels so hard. Somewhere along the way, we picked up the idea that self-care is a luxury. That it’s something we do when everything else is done. A reward for good behavior. But let’s be honest… the work is never really done.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the hustle of getting things done, showing up for everyone else, and checking all the boxes. And before we know it, we’re running on fumes—exhausted, snappy, disconnected, and wondering why everything feels so hard. Somewhere along the way, we picked up the idea that self-care is a luxury. That it’s something we do when everything else is done. A reward for good behavior. But let’s be honest… the work is never really done.
The Truth About Self-Care
Self-care isn’t extra. It’s not selfish. It’s not indulgent. It’s necessary. It’s fuel for your body, your brain, your emotions. It’s what helps you keep going—not just to survive the day, but to actually enjoy it.
Self-care isn’t extra. It’s not selfish. It’s not indulgent. It’s necessary. It’s fuel for your body, your brain, your emotions. It’s what helps you keep going—not just to survive the day, but to actually enjoy it.
Let’s Flip the Script
Instead of saying, “I’ll take care of myself when I have time,” let’s start saying, 👉 “I’ll take care of myself so I have the energy to do everything else.” That one mindset shift can change everything. Because when we care for ourselves, we’re not taking away from anyone—we’re showing up with more joy, more patience, more purpose.
Instead of saying, “I’ll take care of myself when I have time,” let’s start saying, 👉 “I’ll take care of myself so I have the energy to do everything else.” That one mindset shift can change everything. Because when we care for ourselves, we’re not taking away from anyone—we’re showing up with more joy, more patience, more purpose.
A Simple Starting Point: 10 Minutes a Day
If you’re not sure where to begin, here’s a small challenge we can do together: Set aside just 10 minutes a day for self-care. That’s it. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be planned. Just 10 minutes of intentional time to reconnect with yourself. If you’re a planner like me, schedule it in like an appointment. If your life’s more unpredictable, weave it in where you can. The goal is consistency, not perfection.
If you’re not sure where to begin, here’s a small challenge we can do together: Set aside just 10 minutes a day for self-care. That’s it. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be planned. Just 10 minutes of intentional time to reconnect with yourself. If you’re a planner like me, schedule it in like an appointment. If your life’s more unpredictable, weave it in where you can. The goal is consistency, not perfection.
Need Ideas? Try One of These:
Pick one a day—or repeat your favorites:
Pick one a day—or repeat your favorites:
- Step outside and take 10 deep breaths.
- Write down 3 things you’re grateful for.
- Stretch while the coffee brews.
- Sip water with lemon and actually pause while you drink it.
- Put on your favorite song and move your body.
- Diffuse a calming oil while you work or cook.
- Do a quick tapping or breathing session.
- Read a few pages of a book (not on your phone!).
- Massage your hands or neck with oil or lotion.
- Lay down and rest your eyes—even for 5 minutes.
- Journal your thoughts—no editing, just releasing.
- Say something kind to yourself (like “I’m worth caring for”).
- Do a mini skincare routine with intention.
- Sit in silence and just be for a minute.
Remember: it doesn’t have to be fancy. It just has to happen.
Let’s Be Honest for a Second…
Here’s a little mindset shift that keeps me in check: Every time I catch myself saying, “I don’t have time,” I try to reframe it as, 👉 “It’s not a priority right now.” Oof. That one stings a little. But it helps me see where my time and energy are really going—and whether they match the life I’m trying to build. If self-care is truly a priority (and let’s be real—it should be), then it deserves space in your day.
Here’s a little mindset shift that keeps me in check: Every time I catch myself saying, “I don’t have time,” I try to reframe it as, 👉 “It’s not a priority right now.” Oof. That one stings a little. But it helps me see where my time and energy are really going—and whether they match the life I’m trying to build. If self-care is truly a priority (and let’s be real—it should be), then it deserves space in your day.
Final Thought
You’re not alone in this. I’m working on it right alongside you. We all fall into the trap of putting ourselves last. But the more we practice flipping the script and making small shifts, the more it becomes a natural part of how we live. Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated. It doesn’t have to cost money or take hours. It just has to be intentional. You’ve got 10 minutes. Let’s use them well. 💛
You’re not alone in this. I’m working on it right alongside you. We all fall into the trap of putting ourselves last. But the more we practice flipping the script and making small shifts, the more it becomes a natural part of how we live. Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated. It doesn’t have to cost money or take hours. It just has to be intentional. You’ve got 10 minutes. Let’s use them well. 💛
👉 For more wellness tips and mindset shifts, join my free Monthly Wellness Program here: https://getoiling.com/LynnDehmlow/landing/monthly-wellness-program
Repeat these positive affirmations to yourself...
* I am resilient and can overcome life's challenges.
* I am strong and have the power to make the right choices for me.
* I am grateful for what I can do.
For years, I quietly carried a little regret in my heart—wishing I had stuck with the piano. Life got busy, priorities shifted, and that creative part of me slowly faded into the background. But recently, Rob surprised me with a piano keyboard, and something inside me lit up. I decided it wasn’t too late to start again.
Now, I’m teaching myself to play, little by little. My fingers are remembering, my brain is working in new ways, and I can honestly say—it feels incredible. It’s not about being perfect or performing for anyone else. It’s about doing something that is just for me. And that in itself is powerful.
There’s something deeply fulfilling about allowing ourselves to try something new (or return to something we once loved). The world constantly asks us to show up for others—family, work, community—but showing up for ourselves matters too. Learning to play the piano again has become more than just a hobby. It’s become an act of self-care, self-discovery, and joy.
I want to encourage you today: is there something you’ve always wanted to try? Something you’ve put off because it felt too late, too hard, or just too uncertain?
Maybe it’s painting. Writing. Dancing. Learning a language. Picking up an instrument. Whatever it is—let this be your gentle nudge to go for it. You don’t have to be “good” at it. You don’t need to have it all figured out. The beauty lies in the journey. In challenging your mind, stretching your creativity, and discovering that you can still learn, grow, and enjoy something new.
There’s joy in doing something simply because it brings you joy.
So here I am, learning piano again in my cozy corner, delighting in the sound of progress—sometimes clunky, sometimes sweet, but always mine. And it feels so good.
What’s calling to you? What would you love to do, just for you?
Repeat these positive affirmations to yourself...
* I am resilient and can overcome life's challenges.
* I am strong and have the power to make the right choices for me.
* I am grateful for what I can do.
