It seems we're told our whole lives not to express emotions.
Don't be afraid.
Don't feel bad.
Don't get your hopes up.
Don't worry.
Don't be jealous.
Don't be sad.
You're too positive. Too negative. Too confident. Too sensitive.
Why are feelings and emotions (especially those considered to be negative) so taboo? Could it be that we just don't understand them enough and don't want to work through them, so it's easier just to deny their existence, bury them, or blame them on others?
The funny thing about emotions is they kind of have minds of their own. When in a perceived dangerous situation, the amygdala, a small area in the center of the brain, takes over and produces the "fight, flight, or freeze" response, allowing one to act without thinking. Sometimes the amygdala takes over even when not really necessary. Have you ever acted without thinking, even when you weren't in danger?
An emotion usually includes a physical response as a flush of chemical reactions happen in the body: sweaty palms, rapid heart rate, sick stomach, tight chest, etc. The brain stores its responses to stressful stimuli in the body in case they're needed again later. The next time the brain perceives a similar situation happening, it will recall and use the same responses. For example, a child rejected by his father will subconsciously remember the events and physical responses that led up to the feeling of rejection, and will react in the same way over and over again throughout his lifetime as a response to any further perceived rejection unless or until he processes and corrects that pattern. Eventually, the stored emotions can cause stress on the body and lead to a number of illnesses and pain. The body will not let you ignore unprocessed emotions!
The only way to change an emotional response pattern is to first acknowledge the unwanted emotion so it can be processed. This means we have to let ourselves FEEL. When we're intimately in tune with our bodies, we can learn to recognize the emotions and their physical responses so we can respond proactively, allowing those emotions to process through and out of the body instead of taking up residence and wreaking havoc.
An emotion usually includes a physical response as a flush of chemical reactions happen in the body: sweaty palms, rapid heart rate, sick stomach, tight chest, etc. The brain stores its responses to stressful stimuli in the body in case they're needed again later. The next time the brain perceives a similar situation happening, it will recall and use the same responses. For example, a child rejected by his father will subconsciously remember the events and physical responses that led up to the feeling of rejection, and will react in the same way over and over again throughout his lifetime as a response to any further perceived rejection unless or until he processes and corrects that pattern. Eventually, the stored emotions can cause stress on the body and lead to a number of illnesses and pain. The body will not let you ignore unprocessed emotions!
The only way to change an emotional response pattern is to first acknowledge the unwanted emotion so it can be processed. This means we have to let ourselves FEEL. When we're intimately in tune with our bodies, we can learn to recognize the emotions and their physical responses so we can respond proactively, allowing those emotions to process through and out of the body instead of taking up residence and wreaking havoc.
One processing technique I like to use is:
- Start by thinking about an emotion you struggle with: rejection, anger, bitterness, unworthy, anxiety, grief...anything that feels strongest for you.
- Close your eyes and allow yourself to really FEEL that emotion for a moment. Think about situations that triggered that emotion.
- Breathe deeply, allowing the emotion to flow out and the opposite of that emotion to flow back in (i.e. exhale rejection, inhale acceptance). Since the sense of smell is directly connected to the limbic region of the brain, the part that controls emotions, I like to combine this technique with my favorite emotion-supporting essential oils like Frankincense or Sandalwood.
- Breathe in the oil while focusing on exhaling the unwanted emotion and inhaling the opposite side of that emotion. Don't rush it. Really focus on looking inward and continue breathing into the emotions until you feel the "negative" clearing out. Say affirmations to reinforce the positive side of your emotion (i.e. for acceptance: "I accept all that I am) while you continue breathing in the oil.
- The number of times an emotion will need to be processed is different for everyone, so you may need to repeat many times a day for several days.
Please seek the help of a qualified mental health practitioner if you have thoughts of suicide or thoughts of harming others.
Do you have specific emotional blocks that you wish to be free of?
0 Comments