At the beginning of every year, I often think of a word that is my focus for the year ahead. Something that helps me stay in focus and fine tune areas of my life. This year, I could not hone in on just one word that really spoke to me. However, the word INTENTION seemed to come up over and over... and over again. I think my word found me.
In my therapy practice, I have a couple clients who speak of how they are desiring to live with more intention, adding to my own value of what intention looks like to me.
This past year, so many things have changed and been stripped down to the bare basics. Working is a luxury that many of us took for granted with daycare options and schools and even grandparents that were no longer options starting Spring 2020 and continuing on into 2021 for many. Having to refocus our attention to our families and our own well-being was critical. Refining schedules and involvement into our family's lives and schooling was high on the priority list. Family time and cherishing our moments with friends became high priority and extremely important.
However, as we are moving into a phase of life returning to at least phases of normal, we all have to be very intentional (see? There is that word!) about what we are moving back into and possibly away from.
What are the pieces that we have adapted to that we really want to continue in our lives? Values and learning that we need to continue for the sake of our children? Yes, working less and becoming the "teacher" was a new and stressful time for so many of us. However, I know I can speak to my own heart in knowing that I have cherished (most of) these times. And I know my perspective has changed about many things during this eye-opening time.
I recently stumbled across a blog that offered this nugget of truth: “Don’t just drift through life. Live with intention and purpose.” I believe that is one of the most important lessons that a person can learn—and the sooner we get it, the better.
Living a simple life certainly requires intentional living.
We live in a world that is hectic, busy, and hurried, yet in the past year have seen what a life if simplicity looks like. We live in a culture that encourages selfishness and excess. And in a society that is rushing to gain more, satisfaction with less is counter-cultural. As a result, we have been taught that working more and having more is better. We have left our children in the hands of others to let others take over their education instead of being hands-on with what they are learning and how they are growing.
Until now.
To begin living with intention, we must begin by laying a proper foundation and then add practical steps on top of it.
First, Lay the Foundation.
- Realize that your life is made up of choices. Every morning is a new day full of decisions and opportunities. You get to pick your attitude and your decisions. You have a say in what you want the future to look like and how you want to get there! You do not need to be stuck in the same pattern of living that you have been for years… realize that every morning is a new opportunity.
- Evaluate what is around you. Living with intention will require you to take a step back and evaluate the culture you are immersed in to determine where it is headed, how it is affecting you, and if it is taking you in a direction you desire. Do you have negative influence or toxic people in your world? You can change that...
- Examine yourself. I know this past year has offered me a gift in being able to grow and change by working on healing in body, spirit and mind. I am not done yet (are we ever?) and look forward to the ways I can thrive as a result. Give precious time and energy to this endeavor. It is one of the most valuable things you can do.
Second, Add Practical Steps.
- Decide to live your life. Show up. You need to show up and be an authentic YOU. Showing up is HARD. Trust me. I am working hard on doing this task more and better. I hear it comes easier... The value that you have to offer is like no one else and it is to be cherished.
- Define a purpose. We all have a purpose. A way to serve others and contribute to this crazy life in a unique and valuable way! Find a passion to live for that is bigger than yourself. Write it down. It will bring new meaning to your life.
- Set goals. Goals move us and goals shape us. Set goals that are directly in line with your defined purpose. By their very nature, they will introduce INTENTIONALITY into your life.
- Stay focused. We live in a world of constant connectivity and distraction. It is important to prioritize our time and turn off or remove what is not neccessary from our space. Look at the things (clutter, t.v., etc.) that are stealing your joy and robbing your energy so you can be living with intention.
- Learn from others. There are a lot of amazing and successful people out there! They are invested in self growth and know a few things to take note of. They also possess the humility to learn from others. Identify people accomplishing your purpose and goals. Then, study them and learn from them.
The worst thing you could ever waste is your life. Instead, commit yourself to intentional living and living with purpose. What are the ways you are living with more INTENTION as a learning from the past year?
“The quality of your commitments will determine the course of your life.” – Ralph Marston
We are almost a full week into the New Year! Can you believe it?! I love spending time looking at my goals, not just at the end of a year, to figure out what I am doing well and how I can improve. I mean, that is hopefully what we are all doing in this life, right?
I use the Oola Framework to help me sort through goals and set myself up for the areas that I will most benefit from.
The 7 F's are: Fitness, Finance, Family, Field (Career), Faith, Friends and Fun.
We look at each area to see what parts are strong and what parts need a little (or a lot!) of work. Let's look at each of these a little deeper!
Fitness: This area encompasses the health and wellness in your life, body, mind, and soul! There are a lot of sub-topics in this F that can be broken down, from eating and exercise to mindset, emotions and more.
Finance: This area will include a little of everything; income, spending, debt, charitable giving, saving, investing. Ideally, we spend more than we make and we touch on each of these areas in finance in the right ways.
Family: The scope of all your relationships lies here. Identifying healthy family relationships, identifying toxic relationships and how to deal with them, establishing boundaries where needed, offering forgiveness or confronting issues are all a part of Family.
Field: Your career or profession falls here. Even as a stay at home mom, right? This is the area in which you are dedicating your time and work. Ideally, we are in a place that we can say we LOVE what we do, but unfortunately too many people wouldn't say that about the job they spend so much time doing. Sometimes this area is looking at ways to expand what you are doing, shifting your thinking or adjusting other areas of your life to make this area stronger and have a plan to have this be an area you can love.
Faith: Your belief system. It is your understanding of why you are here. What is your purpose? What has the Lord created you for? Sometimes that seems challenging if you are not a "churchy" person or maybe not a believer at all. However, this area still deserves some exploring. I would still encourage you to connect with people and have conversations or find ways to be plugged in to explore what your purpose truly is. You were created for more!
Friends: This includes your social circle. Are there positive or toxic relationships? Do these people support your best you or do they pull you down? Who do you give your ear to? Find the people who feed and stretch you in all the positive, life giving ways.
Fun: What is your passion in life? The everyday things you enjoy doing. Having fun EVERY day is important and having a "bucket list" of larger Fun items is key! I know this area has been a huge struggle for me, as a mom and Enneagram 9, as putting others first is just "what you do." But really, as we know, taking care of us is HUGE and having fun, however big or small, is a large part of that much needed SELF-CARE to keep us sane and happy!
A Few Tricks for Setting Goals:
1. Check your mindset! Are you limiting yourself by what others (or YOU) believe is possible? Sometimes we have that negative voice that takes over and then we end up questioning or downplaying what we know we really can do with self sabotaging beliefs!
2. Spend some time in prayer and reflection before you start looking at the 7 areas. It helps ground us and settle our emotions, preparing us to be ready to look at what we need to.
3. Use Oils. There are a number of oils that are great to use. Really anything that help you feel calm or focused. Peace and calming. Lavender. Clarity. Those are a few of favorite choices. (Contact me for a personalized AFT session by clicking HERE).
4. Grabbing your partner or friend and reviewing your goals. This task can be done together or, ideally, you each create your own and then you come together to discuss your goals and how you can support one another in your goals. It is great to have accountability in things that matter!
5. Journal. Sometimes grabbing an older journal to see what you have been desiring to do or a new one to see what is currently on your heart are both great ways to wrap your mind around the areas that you might need to work on. Especially when it comes to field and fun- those are the areas that people more often feel stuck and struggle to make those changes.
If you are interested in taking the test online, check it out HERE.
If you are needing a little more accountability or help in your goal setting to make 2021 your best year yet, please connect with me and see how I can help. I am a Certified Oola Life Coach as well as a Licensed Mental Health Therapist so I can discuss options to best support you in creating the life you deserve! Connect with me HERE to learn more.
Either way, message me and let me know your TOP goal for 2021!
